The Autistic Lens - Language

Lost in my Special Interests

Where I've Been

I haven’t posted in a while and that’s because I have been busy with a special interest.  If you haven’t read my article on the topic you can read it here.  As it goes with many autistics, I get lost in my special interests to the exclusion of many other things.  In my case, I am able to balance my special interests with home and family, but when I am not taking care of those things my special interests occupy most of my time.  

As I have stated in other articles, I have many special interests and they are interwoven topics.  What may be difficult to understand is that I see the world as interwoven.  You can’t influence one thing without influencing something else or many things.  The more I learn the more I realize how deeply interwoven our world is.  As a result, my interests are handled like the “See also:” portion of an encyclopedia.  I learn one thing and when I have learned a lot about it, I start to throw myself into a topic that is related and will answer questions I had while studying the other topic.  Suffice to say, I’m not a popular person to have a conversation with on many topics.  I can’t keep the conversation as shallow as most people would prefer to keep it.  

What I've Been Doing

The special interest I’ve been throwing myself into lately is learning the Unity game engine and the C# programming language.  This is a great illustration of how I can come full circle on my interests and pull from many special interests.  

I’ve been programming since I was 15 years old.  So that is roughly, 23 years.  I do it for awhile and then I move on to something else.  Eventually I would return to it.  I’ve learned BASIC, GWBASIC, TIBASIC, Pascal, HTML,and C++.  I was making webpages in Notepad before GUIs were a popular way to make them.  I also made text based games and various other programs.  I learned how to use the DOS coding language which came in handy.  I went crazy when I learned what I could do with a batch file.  

Many years later, I took up 3D modeling.  I was on one of my programming kicks and I was working on developing cognitive AI.  I didn’t have the money for the hardware I needed to make a robot I could put the AI in, so I decided to make a virtual body for the AI and stick into a virtual world and see how the code worked.  I spent months working on it and writing notes.  I learned 3D modeling in the hopes that I could make a virtual lab.  I was also learning C++.  

I eventually hit a road block because I didn’t poses the math skills I needed to do it.  I found out later, when I went to college to get my degree in physics, that I had managed to discover some calculus on my own when I had been working on the project.  Because of my education, I now poses the math skills for the kind of work I want to do in regards to my special interests.  

Currently I have decided to work on making a game.  I’ll be working with a friend of mine who is familiar with a lot of this stuff.  The game I want to make is an MMORPG/Survival/Sandbox game.  I won’t go into all the details, but it will incorporate a lot of components from a great many of my special interests.  It will not only serve as a fun game, but also something that can be studied.  I plan on having structures in the game that will allow for a player driven world where a person could watch and see how people structure themselves and handle conflict.  It will also contain economic structures that will allow us to see how people handle an economy.  

In Conclusion

So, this is what I’ve been up to and why I haven’t posted much.  I see a bit of irony in the fact that an autistic trait has stood in the way of me writing about the autistic experience.  

I will continue to work on my current project.  It’s very likely I will work on it for a long time.  I will make more of an effort to write posts more frequently.  

On that note, I am looking for people to write for the blog.  I really want to get other autistics to write articles about their life and experiences, but I am open to a few non-autistics writing about their experience with living with someone with autism.  I’m going to draw the line on parents of autistic children though.  The internet is flooded with that content.  Parents of autistics are driving more of the narrative about autism than autistics are.  But I would love to hear from siblings or someone in a relationship with an autistic.  

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